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好笑的英語笑話故事集錦
笑一笑，十年少，小編為大家整理了好笑的英語笑話故事集錦,希望大家能展顏一笑,記得每天都要開心一刻哦!嘻嘻!
好笑的英語笑話故事【1】
Photo of my wife 我老婆的照片
A businessman enters a tavern(酒館，客棧), sits down at the bar, and orders a double martini on the rocks. After he finishes the drink, he peeks inside his shirt pocket, and then orders the bartender(酒保) to prepare another double martini. After he finishes that, he again peeks inside his shirt pocket and orders the bartender to bring another double martini. The bartender says, "Look, buddy, I'll bring ya' martinis all night long - but you gotta tell me why you look inside your shirt pocket before you order a refill." The customer replies, "I'm peekingat a photo of my wife. When she starts to look good, I know it's time to go home."
一個生意人走進一家酒館，在吧臺坐下，點了一杯加冰的雙料馬提尼。喝完，那生意人往自己襯衣的口袋里瞥了一眼，然后又讓服務(wù)員把杯子滿上。喝完，生意人又往自己襯衣的口袋里瞥了一眼，然后又讓服務(wù)生幫他把杯子滿上。這時酒館的`服務(wù)生說話了，“呃，老兄，我整個晚上給你倒馬提尼都沒有問題，但你得告訴我，你為什么在點下一杯酒前都要往自己襯衣的口袋里偷偷看那么一眼”。生意人回答，“我看的是我老婆的一張照片。如果照片上的人開始變得好看起來，那就說明我喝得差不多了，該回家了。”
好笑的英語笑話故事【2】
Are you a normal person?
During a visit to the mental asylum, a visitor asked the director, "What is the criterion(標準) that defines a patient to be institutionalized?" "Well..." said the director, "we fill up a bathtub, and we offer a teaspoon(茶匙), a teacup, and a bucket to the patient and ask him to empty the bathtub." "Oh, I understand," said the visitor. "A normal person would choose the bucket as it is larger than the spoon or the teacup." "Noooooooo!" answered the director. "A normal person would pull the plug."
參觀一所精神病院的'時候一個參觀者問院長，“你們是用什么標準來決定一個人是否應(yīng)該被關(guān)進精神病院呢?” “呃… …”院長說，“是這樣，我們先給一個浴缸放滿水，然后我們給病人一個調(diào)茶匙，一個茶杯和一個水桶去把浴缸里面的水放清。” “噢，我明白了”， 參觀者說。“一個正常人會選擇水桶， 因為水桶比茶匙，茶杯的體積大。” “錯了”，院長回答“正常人會把浴缸塞子拔掉”。
好笑的英語笑話故事【3】
顆番茄
Two tomatoes went shopping. The first tomato walked fast. The second one asked, "Where are we going?" The first tomato has no answer, the second tomato asked again. The tomato has no answer, so the second tomato asked again. The first tomato finally turned slowly,said: "We are not tomatoes? We can talk?"
兩顆番茄去逛街，第一顆番茄突然走得很快，第二顆番茄就問：“我們要去哪里?” 第一顆番茄沒有回答，第二顆番茄又問了一次。 第一顆番茄還沒回答，所以第二顆番茄又問了一次。 第一顆番茄終于慢慢轉(zhuǎn)頭說：“我們不是番茄嗎?我們會說話嗎?”
好笑的英語笑話故事【4】
Endearing terms
Bernie was invited to his friend's home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request to his wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc. Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, "That is really nice, that after all these years that you have been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names." Morris hung his head and whispered, "To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago."
伯尼應(yīng)邀來到他的朋友莫里斯家吃晚餐。在朋友家，伯尼發(fā)現(xiàn)，不管問他老婆什么問題，莫里斯總要在每句話的前面加上一些親密的稱呼，象蜜糖，我的愛人，親愛的，甜心等等。伯尼對莫里斯說，“你們夫妻倆真夠親密的`，結(jié)婚這么多年了，你還叫她叫得那么親密。”莫里斯低下頭，小聲地對伯尼說，“老實跟你說吧，三年前我忘記老婆的真名是什么了。”
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