英語幽默笑話小報
So the new pilot thought about it. He was a little bit skeptical, but finally he said, "OK, since you did it last year, I guess this year we can do it again." Then he loaded the two buffalos and a few other animals in, and the plane took off. Five minutes later, it crashed in a neighboring area. The three men climbed out and looked around, and one hunter said to the other, "Where do you think we are now?" The second one surveyed the area and said, "I think we're about one mile to the left of the place we crashed last year."
因為他們這樣抗議，所以那個新飛行員想了一想后，盡管還是有點存疑，最后還是妥協說：“好吧!如果去年可以做到，今年應該也可以。”所以他裝了兩頭水牛和一些其他的動物。結果飛機起飛五分鐘后，就墜落在鄰近的地方。這3個人從飛機爬出來看了看四周，其中一個獵人對另一個說：“你認為我們現在在哪兒?” 那個人瞧了一下，說：“我想大概距離去年墜機的地方西邊一英哩遠!”
Pig or Witch 豬還是女巫
A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other, the woman leans out of the window and yells "PIG!!" The man immediately leans out of his window and replies, "WITCH(女巫)!!" They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road. If only men would listen.
一個男人在一條陡峭狹窄的山路上駕車，一個女人相向駕車而來。他們相遇時，那個女的從窗中伸出頭來叫到：“豬!!”那個男的立即從窗中伸出頭來回敬道：“女巫!!”他們繼續前行。這個男的.在下一個路口轉彎時，撞上了路中間的一頭豬。要是這個男的能聽懂那個女人的意思就好了。
While proudly showing off his new apartment to friends，a college student led the way into the den. "What is the big brass gong and hammer ford "One of his friends asked."That is the talking clock.”the man replied.“How does it work!”
"Watch，”the man said and proceeded to give the gong an ear shattering pound with the hammer. Suddenly，someone screamed from the other side of the wall，“Knock it off，you idiots It’s two 0’clock in the morning”
一個學生帶他朋友們參觀他的新公寓，甚是得意。“那個大銅鑼和錘子是干什么用的?”他的一個朋友問他。“那玩意兒厲害了，那是一個會說話的鐘”，學生回答。“這鐘怎么工作的?”
他的朋友問。“看著，別眨眼了”，那學生走上前一把操起銅鑼和錘子，拼命地敲了一下，聲音震耳欲聾。突然，他們聽到隔壁墻那邊有人狂叫，“別敲了，你這白癡!現在是凌晨兩點鐘了!”
Give up your seat to a lady
Little Johnny says "Mom, when I was on the bus with Daddy this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady."
"You've done the right thing," says Mommy.
"But Mommy, I was sitting on daddy's lap."
給女士讓座
小強尼說：“媽媽，今天早上和爸爸在公車上時，他叫我讓座給一位女士。”
媽媽說：“你做得很對呀。”
“但是，媽媽，我是坐在爸爸膝蓋上的。”
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